Ignorance vs. Reality

It's true that IGNORANCE IS BLISS.

When someone leaves us in the dark, we become furious that something is being witheld from us. It doesn't matter if the person tells us that it is better this way, because we acquire this hunger for knowledge and this thirst for truth.
And sometimes...after a time has passed from the moment we found out this particular thing...we long to go back to a time where your mind was clouded with ignorance and you didn't have all of these things to worry about; to just think about.
I know that there are lots of things that I could probably do without knowing. And yet I still want to be aware. I want to live in reality, and yet I want the reality to be different.

Ignorance is bliss, but reaility is real. And sometimes I long for the quiet solitude of ignorance, and other times I hunger for the harsh reality of the world. It's like bipolar.
We want so many things and we are hardly every satisfied.

Phew, I am saying alot of things, and I don't really know where I am going with this...
I guess there's always gonna be some internal strugge of ignorance vs. reaility when we start to reach the second one.

I don't know. It might be different for different people.

Everyone says love hurts, but that isn't true. Loneliness hurts. Rejection hurts. Losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality love is the only thing in this world that covers up all pain and makes someone feel wonderful again. Love is the only thing in this world that does not hurt.

Sometimes I want to beleive that, but I'm still not sure that I do. The quote is nice and all, but is it really true?
Does LOVE hurt?
Maybe love itself isn't the thing that makes yoi hurt, but what love causes?
Lov causes the rejection and the loneliness, but I don't know if Love actually hurts.
Or if it just causes hurt.
I've thought about this a couple times and am curious to hear what other people have to say on the manner.
I mean, if you didnt love you couldn't feel the sting of rejection or the pang of hurt you get when someone blows you off.
Is love just the cause of these bad feelings, and people just get them mixed up? I would like to think that. I would like to think that LOVE is perfect. The only perfect thing on earth. The only thing that can heal our wounds and make us forgot the scars. The only thing on this earth that can make us beleive that everything will work out in the end.

I Want to Get Lost- Sanctus Real (acoustic version)

This is pretty much an amazing song. The lyrics are awesome and the guys voice is beautiful. The normal version is not even nearly as good as the acoustic, so dont even think about listening to that verison.

Trust can take years to build, but only a second to break

I've never been the kind of person that tells people secrets easily. Like I kind of have trust issues. There's only one person on this earth who knows pretty much everything about me.
Just one.
She's not family and we've never even hung out outside of school before.
Sometimes it's strange, isn't it? The people we decide to trust with our hearts.
Just one night me and my friend were talking till the AM and things just starting spilling out. And we are like completely different people so it was not exactly expected.
The morning after this happened I woke up and immediately thought: "Oh holy CRAP what have I done?"
Like, I had regreted the whole thing.
And I have since then a couple of times too.
But in the long run, I would never take back what I told them.
Cause everyone needs that person yah know? That one person that they can vent to.
Well, most people probably have more than one, but I think that I am lucky to trust just one person.
See, cause I have trust issues remember?

It's an odd thing how I have a suppermega hard time trusting people, and yet people feel that they can tell me things. I mean, I have a couple of friends who tell me things that they tell practically no one else.
But I'm proud of this. I love that people trust me enough to tell me things that they so badly want to tell others but are afraid to.

You're not a body that has a soul, you're a soul that has a body.

Singing to Myself in a Starless City

Just a lonely intersection

Tunnels all around
Just a one lane highway
Nothing here unfound

One girl lies awake
A starless night

For her internal fight

External tears wont show
When hope it doesn’t grow
So I’ll taste the light

And walk into a lonesome night

Singing to Myself in a Starless City

Walking alone cause’ no one thinks I’m pretty

Bright lights contrast my suffocation
A bleeding heart gains no attention

Broken veins and broken dreams they need no explanation

When there’s no one to ask the questions

Decisions already made

For their seem to be no options

Feet pad against a concrete street

A street named after me

But the sign you cannot see

Yellow lines

The insides mine

You’re gonna have to fight

If you wanna prove you’re right (about me)

Even though I know you’re wrong (you’re wrong about me)

So don’t sing me my own song

Cause you’ve only got one chance

(Only got one chance before you’re gone)

Singing to Myself in a Starless City

Walking alone cause’ no one thinks I’m pretty

Bright lights contrast my suffocation

A bleeding heart gains no attention

Broken veins and broken dreams they need no explanation

When there’s no one to ask the questions

So I’ll walk this road alone
Too sad to pick up a silenced phone

Singing to Myself in a Starless City

Walking alone cause’ no one thinks I’m pretty x2

Alone in a Crowd

Most people have probably felt alone in a crowd. Like there are so many people around you but none of them know what's going on with you.
None of them understand you.
None of them know what yo're going through.

But is it not possible that the person standing next to you in this crowd is thinking the very same thing? We're always saying to ourselves how alone we are when we don't even put out the effort to become...well, not alone.
I'm not saying that we need to strip down naked and show everyone in the world every scar on our body; rip open our chest to reveal our crumbling hearts. But what if we just gave them a peak?
Just a small peak at the things we go through alone?
And I think that we can all find someone that is able to surpass numbness and ignorance and cringe at our bleeding wrists.
There's always going to be those people that feel nothing when they get a glimpse of blood on our hands, but there has to be someone out there that feels something.

How can we say that we are alone when there are so many other people thinking and feeling the exact same way? It's like we blame others for their ignorance when really we are the ones being ignorant. Ignorant of all the other people that we can relate to.
All of the other people that sing the same song that we do every night.
Allof the other people that run through a seemingly starless city thinking that they are alone.

But we are only as alone as we make ourselves...

We're only as lonely as we make ourselves

I don't know exactly why I created this blog. Maybe I'm hoping that I can help just one person. Not that I'm going to be writing very helpful things. I just have alot of thoughts....alot of thoughts that go unwritten so here I am.

I'm singing to myself right now. Puttig these things out for me to see in a different form.
Maybe I'll discover a star on the way?